Pump Me Up

Mom and I were in the hospital for 10 hours yesterday and 4 today - I got two chemo drugs, tylenol, benadryl, anti-nausea medicine, one unit of platelets, and two units of red blood cells. As expected this time, my counts were very low. I feel a lot better than I did on Sunday, but it is rough sitting in a hospital room for that long with no TV on so many drugs. It was certainly worth it. My nurses are great, though, and we brought them doughnuts today!

Downhill

The past few days have gotten progressively more difficult as my body is being depleted by these past two weeks of chemo. My nausea has been pretty bad, and I'm very weak in general. I have a hard time getting up or moving around... when I do, my pulse shoots up and I get lightheaded. Tomorrow I get more chemo and maybe some blood, depending on how low my hemoglobin is.

Wicked

Yesterday I had some bad nausea but it got better in the afternoon and I was able to go see Wicked! We had great seats, and it was amazing. It was nice to finally do something "normal." My last ARA-C chemo shot was today, and I only have two more weeks of this phase left... I don't go in to see the doctor until Monday - when they will give me two chemo drugs and check my blood count. Hopefully none of my counts drop too much before then... if this month is like last month, I'll need transfusions next week.

Fighting back

Started week 6 of Consolidation today, which meant an Ara-C shot and a doctor's visit. My counts - to everyone's surprise - held relatively steady from last Monday. My body is cursing chemo and holding its own! Even so, I am still nauseated every day but it is manageable. I get lightheaded and short of breath when I get up from sitting or laying down, and shooting pains up my lower back and legs. These aren't horrible, though, and the doctor wasn't too concerned about them. I get three more chemo shots this week and I take chemo pills every night until next Monday. My body isn't invincible - I know, shocking - and my counts will be diving soon. Wednesday night I have a ticket to see Wicked at ASU which I bought way back in February... it seems very possible that the large dollar amount I spent on it will not go to waste, and that I will be able to go if I feel good enough!

Quick Update

This week flew by, thanks to Emend. I got in a few vegetables this week while my counts were up, but stopped yesterday because all of the chemo this week will be sending my body down again. And I don't want an infection! I have had some shooting nerve pain up my legs/lower back, probably from one of the chemo drugs, and my nausea was OK this week - and certainly much better than five weeks ago. Monday is count check & chemo day.

Chemo Crack

Emend is to leukemia patients what crack is to junkies: it's powerful and we'd most likely rob you to get some more.

Although I have not felt "good" in months now, I am feeling wonderful compared to five weeks ago when I was getting these chemotherapies... without Emend. Last time, no medicines seemed to help my nausea/vomiting and it took everything in me to get through it. This time (with this new trial drug), while my counts are high enough, I am able to get out of the house and stay active. I went out to eat and saw The Proposal with my grandma today, for example. I get Ara-C chemo shots 4x a week and 6MP pills nightly for two weeks now - this will kill my complete blood count so within a week I will most likely need transfusions (blood and platelets) and become neutropenic again (house-bound, no fresh fruit/veggies, no immune system, etc). Until then - I'm crossing my fingers that each day this week is better than its predecessor from 5 weeks ago.

Today I am thankful for each and every scientist and doctor who has paved the way for cancer treatments that I get - in the past, if cancer didn't kill you, it hurt (much more) like hell... and in the future, because of these men and women, they'll have a painless cure.

Cancer

Cancer can kill us,
but it can also make us come alive.
Some cancers are in remission, others are in relapse.
There is cancer in our skin, in our blood, and maybe in our bones.
It travels to our breasts, to our lungs, or perhaps to our brain.
The disease mutates the very essence of basic human biology.
Cancer can tear a family to pieces,
or build one out of the shattered remains of people who once were.
Cancer takes us down dark and unknown paths,
to possibly find an adventure we have always been waiting for.
While on the dark, unknown paths appropriately called Life,
cancer can be a friend, a lover, a teacher, an enemy.
We have all known cancer,
during different times, for different reasons, and by different names.
Above all, cancer teaches us a lesson.
Cancer teaches us that we know no lesson.
Cancer will make us cry.
Cancer will make us pissed.
Cancer will make us love.
Cancer will make us fight.
Hopefully, cancer will make us learn.

Jake Harvey 7/13/2009
**don't rip me off, cancer's also expensive

Emend: Miracle Drug?

I started Round 2 of Phase 2 today... these drugs I will get for the next two weeks really kicked my butt last time, but this time we have a new anti-nausea/anti-vomiting medication called Emend! It has worked for other patients and so now I'm trying it. It's still way too early in the game to call it a success, but in my current condition I am in much less discomfort than I was five weeks ago at this very hour. I got down a normal dinner, and have been able to stay hydrated without vomiting. No more Doctors this week... next Monday I get my counts checked again, and get pumped with the chemo.

Weekend Update

My nausea has been a bit better the past couple days, and I'm working on my paper. I start the next four weeks of chemo on Monday. Now that I've had a tiny break... I'm anxious to get this phase over with! The next one is supposed to be a lot easier.

the week off

- I've been pretty nauseated still every day. I get really hungry but don't have much of an appetite for anything... and my stomach doesn't tolerate eating much (quality or quantity).
- Buzzed my hair again because it's thinner, crispy (I don't know another way to explain it), and kinda ratty. The majority of it's still there, though.
- Counts are probably still too low to go out, so I'm not... but I'm stretching every day, walking most days after the sun goes down, and lifting light weights once or twice a week. Trying to keep my muscles active and not let the chemo get to them again!
- Trying to find motivation to finish my darn research paper.

A Break

I get a chemo break this week... my counts were not even close to being able to start the next four weeks. They're also checking into whether or not I have a virus or infection in my stomach, which would be causing my problems.

trying not to hurl

I feel nauseated and have abdominal discomfort for the majority of the day. The only time I have relief is in the morning before eating. The doctor said on Friday the chemo wouldn't be causing nausea still after I got it on Monday.... I suppose we will have to address this again on Monday.

Beautiful Bruises

I have attached some really appealing pictures of the bruising on my belly from my blood-thinning shots, the Lovenox! ENJOY!! :)

Doctor's visit this morning was the only major update for this week. Monday I'm going to have my chest/heart looked at again at the hospital's radiology center to make sure the blood clot is gone. The odd tastes and smells I've been having are a side effect of the chemo, but the nausea shouldn't be as bad as it has been - they ordered a new drug to hopefully help with that, and if it doesn't they are going to refer me to a GI specialist. My counts are coming back up, but most of them are too low to start the next 4 weeks of treatment on Monday. I am going in on Monday, however, after the radiologist, to check my counts. The doctor bet they wouldn't be ready but the nurse practitioner bet they would. Still losing some hair, the top of my head doesn't look normal but I'm growing it out some more just to see what happens!